The road trip
A few weeks ago, a low tide stroke me, I was so frustrated and upset, so I decided to go back to my hometown Taipei. During those days I lived in my friend's place, we took an unplanned road trip, and I will never forget how excited I felt on that day.
It was autumn, but the weather was still a bit hot, so we decided to go to beach by motorcycle. Without any hesitation, we departed from Jingmei to Tamsui, which is a very long distance. Roading for almost an hour, we finally arrived at the harbor in Tamsui and had lunch there. The fish ball soup was so gorgeous that I had several bowls of it. After lunch, it took us one and half hour to get to the beach. The ocean is so azure that I couldn't stop staring at it. I saw the bright orange colored sunset sank into the horizon and the afterglow surrounded the sea level. Too astonished to keep tracking of time, I did not even notice that it was about late evening. We left the beach at six thirty, and we went to Mt. Yangming. The sky above was so clear that I could see it full of shinning stars. We went down the mountain and had dinner at night market, playing a lot of games and had fun.
Although it was so tired to rode almost five hours to have this amazing road trip, after this, I'm full of energy again, and it's been one of best experiment of my life.
You mentioned the reason why you started this road trip and gave lots of details to support your controlling idea. And I appreciate your narration regarding what you had sensed at that time on those roads. These all make your paragraph more completed and abundant.
回覆刪除Pay attention to verb tense. Telling stories?--> stay in the past.
回覆刪除Nice description of the sunset.
adjectives: -ed to describe feeling -ing to describe noun
these words may help you: surface, struck, stayed at
"gorgeous" does not usually describe the taste of food
I think the chronological order make your composition clear .A motorcycle road trip must be very exciting and I hope I could have a chance to have a try!
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